THE SOLDIER IAM

Lost under the feeling of being lost….
Draped in silk and woolen cloth.
I walked., as if I were alone
I walked through the all things left undone
Showers of raindrops thru my skin
Feminine and scrapped my body felt.
T he pain in my eyes, the pain when I choked,
is my blood, it is the sin.
Lost beneath the labyrinth of finding myself,
Draped in twinge and tears,
I walked with a urge, to confess the sin,
As I faced the well lit world outside,
I saw the natives , I saw their dread,
Their face lit wide nameless blush,
There was similar pain in their eyes,
Some were true, some spoke factual,
Bewildered, I stared at the each new staff,
They frowned back cause they thought I was gay,
I walked navigating, each new place.,
And the landmark whispered" I was drifting away",
The truth twingled, oodles of love
It triggered all hatred, and the love for it all,
It wasn’t the whole world I had shared it with,
Shared that, I was lost under the feeling of being lost.
But somehow all seemed false,
Nothing ever seemed precise,
I wanted to die ,
I couldn’t go back to times of yore,
I wanted to read every thought in myself,
I wanted to scream , I wanted to cry..
I wanted to shout and tell them why.
They weren’t just natives,
They were all" my men",
They were fellow friends I had known then,
In the past hidden in the glowing when…
They had lied, they had promised,
That they’ll stay with me,

I knew they did,
I knew they lied, I knew they were false,
I was a soldier all through my life,
I battled though the natives , through their assaults, I battled to support myself,
I battled myself right, but I still stand here all alone….
Oh , cant u see it I am all alone here waiting for the dooms day,
Hoping at least ghosts will feel my pain,
For their souls have felt it just like mine….